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Do You Defensively React to Others in a Conversation

Defensiveness is reactive, similar to the defensive plays in football, where the defense reacts to the actions of the offense In relationships, defensiveness can be both a feeling and behavior. Typically, a defensive feeling is triggered by criticism, put-downs, shaming, intense sadness, or anger.  As a result of the feeling, you exhibit behaviors such as being…

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How Uncontrolled Anger in ADHDers Is A Major Problem

In my post, Do You Play Defense in Your Conversations, Dennis was very easily offended, but wouldn’t talk to Gracie about why. They found an article about how to resolve conflict according to God’s Word. “Whoever is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit than he who takes a…

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How To Use Sleep To Improve Inattentive ADHD

Dennis and Gracie, a young married couple, had been best friends during high school but found themselves in uncharted territory when Dennis revealed that he had been diagnosed with Inattentive ADHD as a teenager. This information explained to Gracie why dealing with him was often very difficult. Sometimes, what he did and said seemed like…

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How To Use Blame To Cover Up Shame

All of us, at one time or another, use blame as a defense mechanism to protect ourselves from having to take responsibility for our actions. Unfortunately, ADHDers seem to use blame more often than others because of their ADHD characteristics such as procrastination, forgetfulness, time blindness, impulsivity, and thinking they are always right. For example: A…

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5 Tips For How To Improve Your Listening Skills

Listening legend Dr. Ralph G. Nichols stated,“The most basic of all human needs is the need to understand and be understood. The best way to understand people is to listen to them.” Listening in Business Unfortunately, people in general do not listen effectively. Statistics show that the lack of listening skills is a major problem in…

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How To Manipulate A Conversation By Not Listening

Hearing vs. Listening Many people, men more than women, but women too, are not listening to what’s being said. They might be able to tell you the words that were said for a few seconds, maybe a couple of minutes, but they definitely couldn’t tell you the meaning. I know one woman who got tired…

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How To Handle People with Explosive Emotions

Explosive Emotions are a very challenging aspect of ADHD. Doctors have found dysregulated emotions difficult to test and diagnose because they occur randomly. According to Attention Magazine, it has been determined that the memory loss that accompanies ADHD often enables stronger than normal emotional outbursts. The brain networks carrying and transferring emotional information are limited…

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How To Deal With A Know-It-All

The Nightly News, the local newspapers, especially, social media have an abundance of opinions floating through the airwaves. I imagine the majority of us, at one time or another, have shared a video or meme on social media then realized later that it was just someone’s opinion or the information was altered to reflect a…

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How To Create Your Life On Purpose

Living a Life On Purpose is far greater than personal happiness, even fulfillment, or peace of mind. It’s greater than your career, family, ambitions or even your wildest dreams. “It is very important that each of us think through what meaning fulfillment has for us. The danger of not doing so is that years from…

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Rejection Sensitivity, Another Side Of ADHD, Is Intensely Painful

In my last post, “What does ADHD have to do with Anger,” Gracie thought she and Dennis had finally turned a corner in being able to communicate effectively until Rejection Sensitivity showed up. Dennis finally revealed that he had been diagnosed with ADHD. Even though they were neighbors and friends during childhood, Dennis had never…